


Quiet Please

by akapolarbear



Category: Final Fantasy V
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-12
Updated: 2016-04-12
Packaged: 2018-06-01 19:34:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6533602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akapolarbear/pseuds/akapolarbear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternate Title: "Why Bartz and Faris Should Never Be Allowed in a Library"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Quiet Please

Lenna liked the Library of the Ancients, she found out. Not only was all the information she could ever need or want housed here, but it was quiet: a nice, tranquil place to think and reflect. She and Galuf were currently enjoying their time here alone. Neither Bartz nor Faris seemed very interested in the library – Bartz claimed not to be much of a big reader, and Faris was completely unenthused with the idea of staying in the library for any longer than they had to. The two of them had wandered off together, leaving Lenna to read up on topics she had never even heard of and Galuf to scan the tomes for anything that may jump out and trigger a memory.

She had been reading up on the evolutionary history of goblins when a shout broke the peaceful silence of the library, causing her and a few of the librarians to jump suddenly. Galuf looked up from some old tome he was reading through cluelessly, scratching at his scruffy beard. “What in blazes was that?”

He and Lenna wandered out into the library’s main hall, looking for the cause of the disturbance. After all, they were the heroes chosen by the crystals; it was only right that tries to stop a problem when it arose. However, once there, they stopped dead in the doorway at what they saw.

“Hey – Faris! Wait…wait for me, come on!”

“Well, maybe if ya _hurried up!_ ”

Coming up the ladder from the lower levels of the library was Faris with her sword unsheathed, which was cause for concern enough, because why would Faris need her sword at the ready in a library? Following behind was a frazzled looking Bartz, his clothes rumpled and his face red with a look of concern and…was that mild panic? He took a moment, trying to settle down, and that must have been when he noticed the two of them standing there, gaping like beached fish.

“Oh…” Bartz gave an awkward chuckle followed by a sheepish grin, “hey, guys! You, uh…find anything interesting in those books? I mean…me and Faris sure did!” He laughed again, but his eyes flashed with that same panicked and almost scared look they had when he was coming up the ladder. Lenna was about to question just what he meant by that, but then another shout came up from the basement levels, this time louder than before.

“No time for idle chitchat!” Faris snarled at Bartz, sword still in hand. She looked to Lenna and Galuf and quickly took the younger girl’s hand in hers. “I’m afraid we must take our leave of this place, Lenna.” She glanced back at the ladder down with a grimace before sending Lenna a look of urgency. “ _Now_ , if we could.”

It was at this point that Galuf stepped in, his wrinkled brow furrowed and twisted in confusion. “Now hang on a minute! Just what is going on here?” The only answer he received was Bartz leaping up and getting behind him, starting to shove him towards the door.

“Sorry, old man…but Faris…has a point this time!” He apologized hurriedly in between pushes. Galuf protested loudly, but Bartz’s force won out against the old man. Lenna didn’t even bother to try and argue; she knew that if both Bartz and Faris were concerned, then something had to be wrong. The princess only nodded and gripped Faris’ hand tighter, allowing the pirate captain to lead her out.

Once the four of them were outside and Bartz and Faris had deemed they were far enough away from the Library, Galuf turned on Bartz and started his interrogation again. “Just what was _that_? What _happened_ back there? And where do you get off thinking you can shove me around like that?!”

Bartz began backing away slightly with his hands up in defense, not looking to get punched in the face. Galuf may have been old, but he was one hell of a monk and Bartz didn’t really want a broken nose at the moment. He looked to Faris, hoping she would say something to save him, but she only looked to the ground with her arms across her chest, scuffing the toe of her boot against the dirt. Lenna gave the both of them a disapproving look with her hands on her hips. “You’re going to have to tell us what happened eventually.”

Bartz glanced between the two women of the party, desperately hoping that Faris would cut in for him, but it seemed she wasn’t particularly keen on sharing either. It wasn’t until Galuf shouted, “Out with it, boy!” that he broke his vow of silence.

“Alright! Alright. So…” Bartz started his explanation, trying to think of the best way to phrase it without getting himself in too much trouble. He paused, his eyes once again landing on Faris, who refused to make eye contact with any of them, and found himself struck with an idea. “There was this weird enchanted book that a monster popped out of when you opened it, right? So instead of closing it in the monster’s face, like a _normal_ person would’ve, Faris decided to stab the book repeatedly with her sword and the librarians got mad at us.”

That statement was enough to grab Faris’ attention and she rounded on him. “ _Excuse_ me?! _I’m_ the one at fault here?! You’re the one who opened the stupid thing! And when the monster came for ya, _who_ was it who panicked like a scared child and started screamin’ at me to kill it?!”

A tint of red spread across Bartz’s cheeks and ears, but it wasn’t enough to make him stand down. “I was _curious!_ How was I supposed to know that the one book I picked out of the _thousands_ in there was possessed?!”

“Thought you said when we first got there, ya _weren’t much of a big reader?_ ” Faris hissed darkly, looking like she was about to draw her sword and get violent at any moment.

“Alright, the both of you!” Galuf grumbled, coming in between them before it came to blows and someone got hurt. “That’s enough! Last thing we need is the two of you killing each other out in the middle of the forest.” Bartz and Faris stared at the old man for a good moment or two before dropping the ensuing conflict, albeit reluctantly. They both still looked a fair bit irritated with each other, but at least now they weren’t trying to duke it through force.

Lenna crossed her arms, though less in anger and more in thought. “Well, now what? We were supposed to find Cid’s grandson in that library, and how are we supposed to do that if we can’t even get back in?” Bartz and Faris begin muttering their apologies, with Faris looking a tad more ashamed.

Fortunately for the group, it wasn’t long before a librarian came after them, seeking their help. As it turned out, Cid’s grandson had gone down into the lower levels of the library and hadn’t returned. When the librarians had gone to look for him, a monster known as the Byblos had stopped them. Thus, the proposition that if they could defeat the Byblos for the librarians, they would be allowed to come and go in the Library of the Ancients as they please was established.

Unfortunately, when they engaged the Byblos in battle, Lenna’s first instinct had been to cast a Fira spell and the entire library had been set ablaze. They were promptly banned from the smoldering remains of the Library of the Ancients for life.

**Author's Note:**

> I always really liked the interactions between the party and humor in this game. Shame it's not more popular.


End file.
